I'm Back!

totoro buddhaWow... it's been a month since I posted here, but I swear I have a good reason. A few of them, actually. Life has been INSANE. There's a shit ton of stuff that I can't talk about here that's been eating my time and brain space. Personal stuff. Professional stuff. Stuff. On top of ... well, that, I've been working my ass off on... well, let me put it this way. I have 3 project deadlines coming up. One April 1, another April 17 and the final one April 30. Can I tell you about any of them? Sadly, not yet. (Soooooon.)

BUT! The awesomeness? I totally discovered my superpowers yesterday. Truth be told, writing was really hard for me for the latter half of the year. I poured a lot of energy into the UNVEILED Kickstarter and production of that book. It was a true *labor* of love to make it happen and get it out in the world. While your support was astounding (and I love you all!) the situation itself took its toll. I had a lot of moments of, "Maybe I should just quit."

I tried working on a new project (Code Name: Tin Foil Ears) but that fizzled quickly (and I had to abandon it for other pursuits). When I had time to devote solely to it? It wouldn't "talk" to me. Again, "Maybe I should just quit."

And there was pressure. Pressure to get SOMETHING out quickly and in the hands of my agent. Something we could sell, something we could get out there to "salvage my sinking career". (These are all things I've thought to myself or pressures I've imposed on situations... nothing but love from the Red Sofa team. Seriously. <3)

What I'm trying to say is, for the past 6 months or so I haven't really felt like a writer. I've felt like someone who when she sits down to write can barely crank out 500 words, someone who has nothing relevant to say and will just fall by the wayside like a lot of other washouts.

So when I wrote 6855 words yesterday and finished a novella, you could say I was a tad emotional.

I am mighty.

Rawr.

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Now, if you're sitting there thinking, "Well, that's you, I am an ass-dragging sea creature who can't string together two words in a day."

First, unto you, I say, "back off. Ass-dragging sea creature is my self-deprication go-to."

Second... look. I don't know anyone whose career has taken the exact path they wanted/intended. We all make up our own pace, our own rules. Sure there are blueprints. There are dos and many, MANY don'ts. There are helpful hints, guidelines, suggestions and a slew of "rules" that have been shown to lead to varying degrees of success. But no one has concrete steps that lead to a pot of gold. No two careers look the same, so you can't compare your apples to JK Rowling's oranges. Shit like that just leads to sour grapes.

YOU define who you are. YOU make your path YOUR way. You write your story.

One bloody word at a time, if that's what it takes.

So write.